Life Guide: The Complete Cynic's Guide to Life

Yesterday is like a dung heap. You can complain about the smell or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden. - jlh

The third certainty of life, after death and taxes, is that nothing will work out the way you want. Life is fully as bad as you think it is - some days just go to Hell faster than others. - jlh

A Cynic is one understands that people are motivated wholly by self-interest. Do not confuse this factual definition of Cynic with the ill-spirited description, "a sneering and sarcastic faultfinding critic."

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Monday, June 14, 2010

Cynical Quotes: Sayings and Quotes about Being Cynical

Please enjoy these Cynical quotes. After you have browsed through these quotes about being cynical, pause for a moment to consider what role you want cynicism and being cynical to play in your life.

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Cynical Quotes: Sayings and Quotes about Being Cynical ...

A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.
- Oscar Wilde

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin

Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.
- George S. Patton

I am free of prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
- W.C. Fields

Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
- W.C. Fields

Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

You want to do mankind a real service? Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories

We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star.
- Stephen Hawking

Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer

You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- anonymous

When you argue with reality, you lose - but only always.
- Byron Katie

What you want is irrelevant, what you have chosen is at hand.
- Spock in Star Trek VI

What is history but a fable agreed upon?
- Napoleon Bonaparte

We are born princes and the civilizing process makes us frogs.
- Publilius Syrus

Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
- Anonymous

The four most important words in any marriage..."I'll do the dishes."
- Anonymous

Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull.
- H. L. Mencken

Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato

Get the facts first. You can distort them later.
- Mark Twain

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
- Oscar Wilde

A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

The rich are not born skeptical or cynical. They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty

I am neither bitter nor cynical but I do wish there was less immaturity in political thinking.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
- George Burns

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Monday, January 18, 2010

National Brotherhood Week - Tom Lehrer

National Brotherhood Week - Tom Lehrer


Everyone does what they do, and it is meddling to try to stop them .

Everyone does what they do, and it is meddling to try to stop them.